Scott Farrell comments:
While I usually make the point that “chivalry is more than manners,” when a manners expert like Peggy Post speaks out on chivalry, it’s time to sit up and pay attention. Peggy is the “great-granddaughter in law” of legendary etiquette expert Emily Post, and is the director of the Emily Post Institute, which is described as a 21st century “civility barometer.” Peggy clearly believes that chivalry and etiquette alike should not be bogged down in the formalities of yesteryear. This article demonstrates that even the manners and courtesies of “gentlemanly” chivalry can be easily updated to exist in harmony with contemporary gender values. The first sentence of the article says it all!
Thankfully, chivalry is not dead. But today, it’s not so much about men rescuing and protecting women as it is about being considerate of others. Holding the door for the person behind you, helping a friend put on his coat, standing to greet a newcomer — a polite person should extend these gestures to everyone, regardless of gender.
Of course, if a man insists on playing the perfect gentleman, and is especially attentive to a woman, she shouldn’t be offended. Whatever his motive, he’s still trying to be kind.
Here are some long-standing chivalries, updated and made gender-neutral:
© 2006 Peggy Post
About the Author: Peggy Post is the spokesperson and author for the Emily Post Institute. Her books include the rewritten [slider title=”17th edition of Emily Posts’s Etiquette,”][/slider] [slider title=”The Guide to Good Manners for Kids”][/slider] and [slider title=”The Etiquette Advantage in Business: Personal Skills for Professional Success.”][/slider] This article is excerpted from her newest book, [slider title=”Excuse Me … But I Was Next: How to Handle the Top 100 Manners Dilemmas.”][/slider] Peggy writes monthly columns in Good Housekeeping and Parents magazines. She is the wedding etiquette expert for InStyle Weddings and WeddingChannel.com. Peggy conducts lectures and seminars for businesses and community groups across the country. This article may not be reprinted in any form without the permission of the author.